All of us at some point in our lives have been mistreated, abused, lied on, cheated on or betrayed. Most of us can usually cope when its someone we don’t know well, but what happens when it is someone we have relationship with? What do you do? FORGIVE.
I looked up forgiveness in the dictionary and it says “compassionate feeling s that support a willingness to forgive. Wait a minute, compassionate feelings, I have to show compassionate feelings? I was the one who was wronged….. Forgiveness is one of the hardest things to do, but it must me done. An Unforgiving heart is like a cancer that will slowly eat away at your life. Un-forgiveness will make you bitter. Un-forgiveness will take away your access to Jesus. Matthew tells us if we don’t forgive then we cannot be forgiven by our heavenly father. . Lord knows I need God’s forgiveness 24 hours a day and 7 days a week.
How do we forgive?
1. Talk about it. Be honest with your feeling so that the offender can understand how the situation has affected you. This may not be a one time cure all. It may take several discussions. Remember not to sin. The bible says to be angry but don’t sin. So no hitting, no choice words or cheap shots. It only makes the situation worse.
2. Don’t look to the individual who wronged you to fix you. Often we want the person to do something. When you think about it what can they do now? What’s done is done. Only God can heal.
3. Remember when we were the offender. When we are in the position of needing to be forgiven we want it to be swift, but when we are in the position to forgive we want to park on the reasons why we are hurting. If we continue to focus on the hurts we will never be healed from the offense.
4. Choose to let it go. Only you have the power to choose what you will focus on. Will you focus on the hurt or the healing? Will you choose to be the victim or victorious?
There is a saying that goes time heals all wounds. If we as Christians subscribe to that then we are saying God has limits. The women with the issue of blood was healed instantly. Blind Bartimaeus was healed instantly. Lazarus came leaping instantly. We can be healed from offenses instantly, but it is according to our faith and desire.